Archive for March, 2010

Never Talk to the Police »

What’s the best response when a cop asks you something? Silence, or a short, polite non-answer. Shut up. Just. Shut. Up. The police are not your friends. They are not there to protect you. They are there to arrest you, convict you, and take your money or your freedom or both. You should be polite […]


Since When is Silence a Bad Thing? »

In North Carolina a high school showed up with a piece of red duct tape across his mouth. “Silence for Christ” was written on it.  He was suspended when he refused to remove it. I’m not sure, but I think I was in tenth grade when I went to a class with a 45 record […]


Inspiring Badges »

As you probably know by now the Texas school board has revised their educational guidelines so severely they’re going to have to put “educational” in quotation marks.  Phil Plait made fun of them, then, on Facebook, reacted to people whining about it. In the ensuing conversation I made a comment about the Moron Badge of […]


No Lesbians At The Prom, Please »

Note to non-US readers:  Knowing a few facts about the state of Mississippi will make the following story more understandable. The sole purpose of Mississippi is to keep Alabama off the bottom of every quality of life list.  Whenever you see a chart of US states comparing unwed births, high school dropouts or average number […]


Drop that Salt Shaker and Put Your Hands In The Air »

The New York Legislature is considering a bill that would make it a criminal offense for restaurant chefs to add salt to food. Yes, you read that right.  Once again, the absurdity of real life makes satire obsolete. This is exactly what happens when you let the nanny camel get its nose in the tent. […]


Test Your Mass Mailings »

Marketing failures can teach you as much, if not more, as marketing successes. I just received an e-mail from a company I’ve done business with.  The headline was “Free Ground Shipping from <Company Name>.  I opened it and saw a very attractive ad, which I clicked. Instead of  taking me to http://companyname.com/ it loaded http://marketing.companyname.com/ […]