{"id":21,"date":"2007-06-26T00:00:53","date_gmt":"2007-06-26T04:00:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.davehitt.com\/blog2\/2007\/06\/26\/global-warming-is-to-blame\/"},"modified":"2007-06-26T00:00:52","modified_gmt":"2007-06-26T04:00:52","slug":"global-warming-is-to-blame","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.davehitt.com\/blog2\/global-warming-is-to-blame\/","title":{"rendered":"It’s All The Fault of Global Warming"},"content":{"rendered":"

Sixteen Things You Can Blame on Global Warming<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. I thought that the killings in Darfur were the result of tribal warfare, rebel groups, a corrupt government (is there any other kind?) and regional politics. Silly me. It turns out it was caused by global warming<\/a>. And that’s according to the UN, so you know it must be true.<\/li>\n
  2. Scotland is preparing for a crime wave, which will be caused by global warming<\/a>.<\/li>\n
  3. I like cats, but you can have too many of them. If you do, blame global warming<\/a>.<\/li>\n
  4. When frogs started dying off all over the world the Rachel Carlson crowd insisted that pesticides were to blame. It turned out it was due to parasites and fungus. And, of course, global warming<\/a>.<\/li>\n
  5. If you have cockroaches, guess why? Yep, global warming<\/a>.<\/li>\n
  6. Beetles? Oh yeah, that’s because of global warming<\/a> too.<\/li>\n
  7. The snows of Kilimanjaro have been receding for years, and of course global warming<\/a> is to blame for that. No, wait<\/a>.<\/li>\n
  8. Damn, insurance is expensive. All because of global warming<\/a>.<\/li>\n
  9. The reason hurricane Katrina was so nasty was because of global warming<\/a>. (But wait – the following year we had the fewest, mildest hurricanes in a long time. (Shh, don’t tell anyone.))<\/li>\n
  10. Are Tornadoes caused by global warming<\/a>? Of course!<\/li>\n
  11. Is there as shortage of hookers in your area? Damn that global warming<\/a>!<\/li>\n
  12. Why was your web site down? Global warming<\/a>, of course.<\/li>\n
  13. If an old guy is growing tiny bananas in his greenhouse, you know global warming<\/a> is to blame.<\/li>\n
  14. Is all this making you feel ill? Maybe it’s not this list; you’re sick because of global warming<\/a>.<\/li>\n
  15. Wolves eat fewer moose in one island and more moose on another, all because of global warming<\/a>.<\/li>\n
  16. And finally, we used to always be able to count on using the phrase “as cold as a nun’s tit in a brass bra.” Unfortunately, global warming<\/a> has put an end to that too.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Sixteen Things You Can Blame on Global Warming I thought that the killings in Darfur were the result of tribal warfare, rebel groups, a corrupt government (is there any other kind?) and regional politics. Silly me. It turns out it was caused by global warming. And that’s according to the UN, so you know it […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[8,4],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.davehitt.com\/blog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.davehitt.com\/blog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.davehitt.com\/blog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.davehitt.com\/blog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.davehitt.com\/blog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=21"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.davehitt.com\/blog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.davehitt.com\/blog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=21"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.davehitt.com\/blog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=21"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.davehitt.com\/blog2\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=21"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}