The Mayor of Cincinnati won’t fire off a starter pistol to signal the beginning of an upcoming road race, because he doesn’t like the symbolism.

“I think the symbolism is just bad,” he said. “It’s just something I don’t do.”

The mayor says he’s going to blow a whistle instead.

Last year the city had 87 homicides, and this is his solution.

Pathetic, isn’t it? Starter pistols don’t kill people, people with starter pistols. . . no, that doesn’t work either. You can’t kill someone with a starter pistol unless you beat them to death with it.

One of the race’s organizers said “We’re just happy to have the mayor I don’t care if he wants to bang pots and pans together.”

What? Doesn’t she realize a cast iron frying pan makes a great homicide weapon? I’ll bet at least a few of those 87 homicides were done with kitchen utensils.