Quick Hitts

You’ve probably seen those commercials where people with vastly different politics are sitting on a couch in front of the ocean preaching about Global Warming. (Pronounced so you can hear the capital letters.) The creepiest/most disgusting of them is the one that pairs Al Sharpton with Pat Robertson.
Let’s break this down. [...]

Three women from the isle of Lesbos are shocked, shocked I tell you, to learn that gay women call themselves Lesbians. Or if not shocked, at least bitchy about it. They’re suing the “Homosexual and Lesbian Community of Greece” over their name.
“My sister can’t say she is a Lesbian,” said Dimitris Lambrou. “Our [...]

Thailand’s Assumption University (yes, that’s their real name) asked 2400 teenagers if they were planning on having sex on Valentine’s day. 27% of them said “yeah, maybe.”
Bangkok police, armed with the knowledge that teenagers never lie, especially about sex, are springing into action. They’re going to turn all the lights on at public [...]

The joke for this one is built in and obvious.
Can you come up with a better one?

(A fiend of mine sent me this.)
Hillary Clinton goes to a primary school in New York to talk about the world. After her talk she offers question time.
One little boy puts up his hand. The Senator asks him what his name is.
“Kenneth.”
“And what is your question, Kenneth?”
“I have three questions: First – whatever happened to [...]

In Denver a 22 foot statue of Jesus was struck by lightening. The bolt from heaven blew off its right arm and, for good measure, its left hand.
“Don’t look for any religious symbolism here – it was only a freak act of Mother Nature, says Sister Ilaria.”
Really? I’d be willing to bet a [...]