01.28.2008 | 12:31 am | Pop Culture, Religion
The internet is abuzz with the tales of Anon/Anonymous, a group of hackers who promise to drive Scientology from the internet. They’ve been going after Xenu’s sites with Denial of Service (DoS) attacks, and in the process managed to take a site belonging to a Dutch school.
There’s a lot of conversation in lots of forums debating the morality of their approach. Most discussions include tiresome dictionary arguments about whether Scientology is a cult or not.
Let me answer the last question first. It is. If you don’t think so, then you’re too damn stupid to appreciate this blog, so go away.
Is it right or wrong for some to fight the science fiction religion with illegal, underhanded, sneaky, vigilante-style attacks? I’ve thought about this quite a bit. I pondered it for at least ten minutes (well, maybe eight) before forming my opinion. A few points I considered:
The government has had a very long time to deal with Scientology, and has failed miserably, mostly because they’ve ignored the problem. Given Scientology’s published polices and their history of using civil litigation for the sole purpose of harassment, they should have been ruled as Vexatious Litigants decades ago, and bared from bringing lawsuits without special permission. When the government refuses to hand out justice the job falls to the citizens.
The best way to deal with a bully, the only way to deal with a bully, is to fight back. For the best results, beat the shit out of him. If that’s not possible, just fighting back will usually do the trick.
In the game “The Prisoner’s Dilemma” the best strategy is tit for tat: Do unto others what they did unto you the last time. It doesn’t matter if your opponent is aggressive, passive, friendly, nasty or random - over time tit for tat always gets the most favorable results.
I disagree with Voltaire. I may not believe what you way, but will defend to the death your right to say it, unless you are trying to silence me. In that case I’ll sit back and smile while you get what you deserve.
Considering the violent and filthy history of these evil people, they deserve not only be driven from the internet, but destroyed in the real world as well. They deserve to be harassed and spit at and derided and attacked, but for phase one, driving them from the internet would be a good start.
But if these vigilantes really want to have an effect, they’ve got to do more than flood their web sites with DoS attacks. That will annoy them and piss them off, but it won’t cripple them. Anon needs to do some real damage. They need to hit them where it matters - in their wallets. Shutting down their web sites is briefly satisfying and somewhat entertaining. Emptying their bank accounts would be a real accomplishment.
A good start would be to hack their servers and gather all their financial information. Then they should remove all the money they can find in every one of their bank accounts. Let the Xenu lovers suffer the bankruptcy they’ve visited on so many of their followers.
The next step would be to extend this courtesy to anyone promoting them. “Sorry, Mr. Cruse, your credit card has been declined.” “Sorry Miss Alley, you’ll have to pay cash.” “Mr. Hayes, management has requested that I your money before serving your dinner.” I’d leave Travolta alone, at first, became I haven’t seen him shilling for them except for a blurb on their site. But the moment he says anything about them that could be construed as a plug, bankrupt him. Imagine the headlines. Imagine the sense of accomplishment.
L. Ron Hubbard said, “The purpose of [a lawsuit] is to harass and discourage rather than to win. The law can be used very easily to harass, and enough harassment on somebody who is simply on the thin edge anyway, well knowing that he is not authorized, will generally be sufficient to cause his professional decease. If possible, of course, ruin him utterly.”
His organization deserves no better. Best wishes, Anonymous, whoever you are. I very much doubt you’ll succeed, (at the moment, Scientology’s primary site is up and operating fine) but I applaud your noble cause.
Comments (13)
01.27.2008 | 3:06 pm | Junk Science
In 1998 Patrick Michaels, a University of Virginia climatologist, proposed a bet: “If we were of a betting sort (and there are some nasty rumors going around that we are), we would be willing to wager that the 10-year period beginning in January 1998 and extending through December 2007 will show a statistically significant downward trend in the monthly satellite record of global temperatures.” Tree huggers should have taken him up on it, because the data is in and he would have lost. Proof of Global Warming!
Well, not so much. Not at all. There have been tiny changes, but none that are statistically significant. One dataset shows a drop of -0.06 degrees Celsius. Another shows an increase of .04 degrees. Another shows an increase of .173, yet another shows an increase of .142. This article doesn’t specify the margin of error, but it’s likely that the spread covers the numbers well enough to write off even these minuscule changes as random noise.
So great news, right? This has been on the front pages of newspapers everywhere right?
Yeah, right.
Comments (0)
01.20.2008 | 6:37 pm | Politics
Our hearts go out to the president who announced today that Barney, his beloved Scotty, was hit by a truck in front of the White House and had to be put to sleep. The secret service agent who was driving the Hummer (shown on the right), expressed deep regret, but said the dog ran right out in front of him and there was nothing he could do.
Cheney, smirking in the background, seems to be thinking “I never liked that dog. The next time we went hunting I was going to “accidentally” shoot him. In the face.”
(Reality check: This picture really came from the New York Times, America’s most respected tabloid. It accompanied a story about an the white house’s attempt to prop up the economy. Shouldn’t they be a little happier about their plan?)
Comments (0)
01.20.2008 | 5:28 pm | Political Correctness, Big Brother
Some German smokers are showing how upset they are with the new smoking ban by sporting a black t-shirt decorated with a yellow Star of David, with “Smoker” written across the star. This has upset just about every Jewish group in existence.
The smokers are in the right church, but most definitely in the wrong pew. Comparing their government to the way Hitler treated Jews is offensive and inappropriate. They should be comparing their government to the way Hitler treated smokers. The parallels are chilling.
Comments (1)
01.17.2008 | 7:17 pm | Amusing, Very Old Jokes
The joke for this one is built in and obvious.
Can you come up with a better one?
Comments (0)
01.16.2008 | 2:05 pm | Yeah - That'll Work, Nanny Nation, Big Brother, Politics
Inspired, perhaps, by California counties that have made it illegal for people to smoke in their own homes, the government is eager to continue expanding their tentacles into once private residences.
The California Energy Commission wants to require all new homes, and remodeled homes, have special radio controlled thermostats which Big Brother could control. First they’ll set it to “suggested” temperatures. Customers would be allowed to override the “suggestions,” but Big Brother would have the ultimate control, and the final say.
Concerns that the signal could be hacked have been brushed aside. A spokesweasel for PG&E says that’s not possible, a statement guaranteed to inspire geeks to prove her wrong.
Comments (1)
01.10.2008 | 12:50 am | Big Brother, Politics
Thoughts on the New Hampshire Primary
That’s it. We’re fucked.
No one had more money than Ron. No one had more grass roots support. The day before the primary Jay Leno gave him a half hour on the countries most popular late night talk show. The primary was held in the Live Free Or Die state. The Free State Project state.
And he got 8%. Eight miserable fucking percent. A third less than some evangelical asshole who thinks the earth is 6,000 years old and wants to add not one, but two amendments to the constitution to make his superstitions the law of the land.
I figured America was over when the Supremes outlawed private property and ruled that the feds could use the interstate commerce clause to regulate everything, including things that didn’t involve commerce or anything interstate. But the Free State Project looked encouraging, and full of possibilities. Slim possibilities, but still, possibilities. And although I knew Ron was a long shot, the groundswell of support made me think there just might be hope for the country. We could get it back from the fascists and the socialists and start living like Americans again, instead of as slaves. I didn’t really expect him to win, but figured capturing a large portion of the vote would start pushing American politics in the right direction.
I’ve been interested in politics since the Nixon administration. I’ve never seen anything like the huge populist support Paul has had. I’ve never seen anything close to it. It filled me with hope and joy and a belief that there was still a chance there were enough Americans in this country to eventually defeat the United Statsits. And with all that enormous support, the fantastic publicity and with the incredible enthusiasm of millions of people, he gets 8%.
All that hope, all that enthusiasm, all for nothing. Now our only choice is being crushed under the thumb of socialism or the heal of fascism.
“But,” says the True Believer, “We’re getting our message out there! People are hearing the message of liberty and liking it!” Yes, what an impressive showing. Libertarians have been preaching the message for thirty years. And in the most popular, well known, liberty oriented candidate ever, in the most liberty oriented state of the union, you got 8% of the vote. Whoop De Fucking Doo. Maybe in another thirty years you can double that number. Won’t that be impressive.
The US is finished, my friends. It’s over. It’s done. The Ron Paul Campaign is finished. The Free State Project is a joke. We are a nation of cheerful retards lining up for Special Olympics. We say retarded things like “I have a right to health care” or “the rich don’t pay enough taxes” or “this is a Christian nation” or “we’ll stay in the Middle East for a hundred years if that’s what it takes to fight terrorism,” and the politicians pat us on the head and say “there there, you really are smart.” We race our spastic race while they clap and cheer us on. They’ll be at the finish line giving big hugs to everyone with no regard as to who actually won, because all that really matters is that you try. And while they’re passing out their hugs they’ll be winking at each other, amused at how well they’ve fooled us again and eager to get back to faithfully serving their corporate masters.
“Change!” they all shout. “We stand for Change. Real Change this time. Not like the last time and the time before and the time before that and the time before that when we lied to you and you believed us and we lied to you again and you believed us again and again and again. This time we really mean it!”
You want to feel change, my friends? Then put your hand in your pocket and finger your coins.
The war on Some Drugs will continue. Our standing as the country with the highest percentage of our population in prison will remain unchallenged. We’ll keep jailing people for non-violent victumless “crimes” and prisons will remain a growth industry. Our dollar will remain fiat currency and drop in value every time they print up more. The Patriot Act will remain in place. Habeas Corpus will not be returning. Nor will private property. We will all get our Real ID cards and, like good little Germans pre WWII, obediently present them to uniformed thugs every time they demand to see our papers. The pussification of the country will continue to accelerate. More and more personal decisions will be taken from us as the government continues to pass laws telling us how we must raise our children, what we can eat, where we can have a smoke (not in your homes, comrades!), what we can drive, what we can say and where we can say it. And 92% of the population will smile and say “It’s a free country!”
I’m done with political activism. It’s useless. It’s pointless. The game is so deeply and thoroughly rigged that there’s no possibility of real change for the better. Part of that rigging is a system that makes it impossible for anyone who isn’t one of the “two” parties to have even the slightest chance of winning. But most of the rigging is simply pandering to the gullibility and stupidity of the majority of “Americans.” Real Americans, those who truly understand liberty, who have studied the constitution and the writings of the founding fathers and really know what it is, are such a rare breed that we have absolutely no chance of overcoming the multitude of assholes who mouth the word with one sentence and cheer on the expansion of the government with the next.
Screw it. I’ll still bitch and moan, because it’s fun, but getting involved is for suckers, and I’m tired of being one. I’m getting too old to keep tilting and windmills, and it’s time to concentrate on having as much fun as I can for the rest of my years. It’s time to kick back with old friends and make a new ones and stop wasting time trying to change things. I haven’t played video games much, because I haven’t had the time. But maybe I’ll go get an Xbox and waste every evening in pointless battles against teenagers I don’t know or care about. Or put a bigger hard drive on the Tivo and renew my Netflix subscription. Or devote my time to perfecting some new vice or nasty habit. Because trying to improve this country is a pathetic waste of time and effort. The best we can hope for is to have a few laughs watching it circle the drain.
Comments (9)
01.7.2008 | 12:35 am | Political Correctness
Nope. Not any more.
Sweden’s Army (yes, they have one) had an insignia featuring a lion, viewed from the side. He was obviously a boy lion. Evidently some of the women didn’t like that, so they demanded he be neutered. (Ain’t that just like a woman.) He was.
Christian Braustein, of the army’s Tradition Commission, said: “We were forced to cut the lion’s willy off with the aid of a computer.”
Remind me, when was the last time Sweden won a war? How likely are they to win another, when they advertise to the world they’re dickless?
Comments (5)
01.7.2008 | 12:13 am | Politics
Some British deaf groups are demanding the “right” to create deaf embryos.
Ballard, …said: “Most parents would choose to have a hearing embryo, but for those few parents who do not, we think they should be allowed to exercise that choice and we would support them in that decision.
“There are a number of deaf forums where there are discussions about this. There are a small minority of activists who say that there is a cultural identity in being born deaf and that we should not destroy that cultural identity by preventing children from being born deaf.”
Words don’t fail me very often, but I’m finding it difficult to come up with a pithy comment on just how creepy and disgusting this is.
Comments (1)
