Quick Hitts

“Never pick a fight with someone who buys ink by the barrel”  – Mark Twain (maybe)

With the advent of the internet we all have barrels full of bits that are nearly free.  Any person annoyed with any company can easily air their grievances to thousands of people.  This should inspire companies to do whatever they can to make their customers happy, but far too many don’t get it yet. 

The latest one I’ve seen is “United Breaks Guitars,” a YouTube video that currently has 168,000+ views, 6,000+ ratings, and over 2,000 comments.  It’s the story of a musician sitting in a United airplane, watching out the window while the baggage monkeys manhandle his expensive guitar, and United refusing to address the damage they caused. 

United claims they’re finally reopening negotiations, but the damage has already been done.  And word is he has two more videos in the works. 

Wise up United (and everyone else).  Fixing the guitar would have cost you $1400, replacing it would have cost $3500.  It’s a safe bet his video has cost you a lot more than that. 

United Breaks Guitars

I’ll be doing an interview about Blood Witness on Podioracket this Thursday, June 9, from 9:00 – 10:30 PM (EST). If you’ve got any questions about the novel, Jehovah’s Witnesses, or cults in general, please join us.

Call (347) 996-3319 and join the conversation.  While it’s running you’ll be able to listen to it live on this page.  If you’re too cheap to call there will also be a chat room where you can ask questions.

If you have questions but won’t be around for the show, send them to me (hittman@davehitt.com) and we’ll try to answer them.

If you haven’t listened to the novel, but intend to, please note that this is likely to be full of spoilers.

The teacher’s union is one of the biggest reasons US education sucks. They’ve made it  impossible to give a teacher a raise for being good at their job.  And it’s even more impossible to get rid of the bad ones.

In New York City over 700 teachers receive full pay ($70,000/year) for not teaching.  They’re all waiting for hearings about their misconduct, but have been removed from the classroom.  They report to “rubber rooms” where they do anything they like, burning through eight hours and our tax money, for months and sometimes years.  Of course, they still get the vacations and holidays working teachers get.  They cost taxpayers sixty five million dollars a year.

Things are slightly better in LA, where only 178 teachers are paid to do nothing.

Why? Because it’s getting rid of a rotten teacher is harder than throwing away a boomerang.  Take a look at the procedure.

Is it any wonder we encounter so many stupid people every day?

If you’re attacked in the UK and defend yourself with a gun you will spend more time in jail than your attacker.  As a result both criminals and decent people are arming themselves with the next best thing – knives.

Britain is even more of a nanny state than the US, so it’s not surprising that for the past couple of years doctors have been whining about knives being pointy and citizens getting all stabby with them. A couple of years ago they when they suggested making pointy knives illegal, but  no one took them seriously.  But now anti-stab knives have been invented.  (Click the photo for a better look.) They have a tiny, nearly useless  point on the end, under a blunt stubby section designed to snag on clothing if someone tries to stab a bad guy with it.

I’ve worked in a restaurant, and chiefs are serious about their knives.  They’ll spend hundreds of dollars for one or two knives, and take with them when they leave work so no one else can use them.  They keep them extremely sharp, and they are all pointy.

Considering how nanny the UK has become I’m guessing that in a couple of years pointy knives will be banned in professional kitchens, and then made illegal in the home as well.  You think English food sucks now?  Just wait.

Among the many reasons I remain skeptical about Global Warming – excuse me, Climate Change – are the veracity and agendas of those promoting it.  Government, non-government and quasi-government organizations (like the UN) are spreading fear at every opportunity while jumping on the chance to grow their power and income.

The EPA has been a junk science machine since the days of Carol Browner, who changed the mission from cleaning the environment to harassing business for sport and expanding their tentacles into every aspect of American life.  Her administration released the famous second hand smoke “study,” which is a blueprint of how to turn a complete absence of evidence into a junk science proclamation that the mass media will lap up like a stray dog gobbling diseased rodent parts.  It inspired a movement that has grown into an American Jihad against smokers.

The EPA has become a good “opposite barometer” to attach to your bullshit meter.  If they say something is true, it’s probably a lie.  And the concept of GW has them creaming in their jeans at the possibilities.  They’ve expressed glee at the prospect of regulating everything, right down to the kind of lawn mower you can buy.

So it should come as no surprise that when a serious, non-crank report, (PDF file)  created by their own staff, advised caution and discussed the possibility that the fear was unfounded, they buried it.    While they continue to whine about Bush suppressing their findings, it turns out they do a much better job of that themselves.

Two days later and we’re still be bombarded by stories about Michael Jackson.  I grew up listening to the Jackson 5, loved Off the Wall and Thriller, but enough already. 

Jackson was raised a Jehovah’s Witness, and was still one when he did the Thriller video, which is why he prefaced it with the disclaimer: 

“Due to my strong personal convictions, I wish to stress that this film in no way endorses a belief in the  occult.”

The sixteenth time I saw excerpts from the video it occurred to me that he’d still be alive today if instead of becoming a Jehovah’s Witness Zombie he had become a Jehovah’s Witness Vampire. 

This is another installment in our continuing series of  Things Atheists Didn’t Do.

A pedophile priest, not an atheist, claimed he was only giving his victim anatomy lessons.

Muslims in Pakistan stoned a Christian man to death.  His crime?   Drinking tea at a roadside stall that was designated for Muslims only.

When a Christian church that tortured a gay teen via an exorcism to rid him of his faggy demon was criticized for their stupidity, Dr. Gary Cass of the Christian Anti-Defamation Commission slammed the critics, accusing them of intolerance.

An Oregon couple let their 15 month child die of pneumonia, refusing medical treatment and praying for her instead. If her parents had been atheists she would be alive right now.

An orthodox Jewish couple are suing their neighbors, claiming that an automatic hall light, which is triggered by people entering the hall, imprisons them in their apartment. This, they claim, prevents them from leaving on the Sabbath. If they were atheists instead of idiots they could leave whenever they want.

Eight people drowned a 22-year-old mother of two trying to lift a curse from her. She would have been much better off with atheist friends.

An Islamic woman starved one of her children to death, after torturing her, because she thought she was possessed.  Her other five children were seriously malnourished.  Too bad her mother wasn’t an atheist.

Fr. Alphonse de Valk has declared that Atheism is a threat to civilization. If he were an atheist he’d be smarter than that. Not to be outdone, Cardinal Cormac Murphy O’Connor has declared that atheists are not fully human.

Opening a dialog between religions may not be a good idea.  Ernest McCullough, a Christian, got into an argument about religion with a Muslim, who ended the debate by shooting him in the leg.

In Maryland, a woman starved her son to death because he wouldn’t say Amen. She’s expecting him to be resurrected.  That hasn’t happened so far. Yet another child who would have been much better off with atheist parents.

In India, at least 50 people went blind staring into the sun looking for an image of the Virgin Mary. Atheists are never blinded by the light.

When a woman with an atheist boyfriend asked Pat Robertson for advice about finding a middle ground with him, Pat told her to break up with him because he’s “serving the devil.”

In India a “Hindu Taliban” is attacking women for drinking in bars and dressing inappropriately, including those wearing bathing suits at the beach and t-shirts with pictures of their deities on them.  There are no reports of atheists beating up women over religion.

In Afghanistan, a Mullah who spoke out against suicide attacks was murdered by other members of his religion of peace.

In Russia, two Jehovah’s Witnesses went on a murder spree killing 13 people to rid the world of sin. (They should have just become vampires.)

In India, two seven-year-old girls were married to frogs to prevent the disease outbreaks in the village. Atheists don’t advocate girl-frog marriage.

A pretty sixteen-year-old girl was stabbed to death by her Muslim brother for listening to rock and roll and wearing makup.   He stabbed her 26 times.  He was preserving the family’s honor.