Archive for April, 2008

MADD Has A Hissy Fit About GTA4 »

MADD is demanding that Grand Theft Auto be giving the rating of Adults Only because players can drive drunk in the game. Citing their tiresome ass numbers, they proceed to give us their standard lecture, and then “suggest” that Rockstar remove the game from the market. Rockstar has spent an estimated $100 million developing the […]

Drop Those Chips and Put Up Your Hands »

North Carolina police staged a military style raid to protect the pubic from….a poker game. After wasting taxpayers’ money with a ten month investigation, they burst into a home poker game and arrested 27 people, including an assistant prosecutor.  They confiscated all the money they could find, including, according to one report, cash that people […]

Passive Drinking – Nannies Never Sleep »

Now that European nannies have succeeded in using bogus claims to outlaw smoking nearly everywhere , They’re moving on to their next target: passive drinking. Uber Nanny Dr. Peter Anderson claims, “The total tangible cost of alcohol to EU society in 2003 was estimated {pulled out of someone’s ass} to be €125bn (€79bn-€220bn), equivalent to […]

Carter and The Terrorists, Sitting in a Tree… »

Once again the Palestinian people had an opportunely to vote, and once again they chose Hamas, who vows to destroy Israel, by a huge margin. Jimmy Carter, the most incompetent president in my lifetime, was there to encourage the terrorists. He’s called for them to be recognized by other nations because maybe they might kinda […]

No More Skinny French Models »

While most countries are badgering their citizens to lose weight, France thinks they have the opposite problem – some of their citizens are too skinny. New French legislation makes it a crime to promote excessive thinness. Anyone guilty faces fines of up to $70,000 dollars and three years in jail, where the food is, evidently, […]

The Catholic Church Makes it All Better »

Aw, the pope is deeply ashamed that his church spent decades shuffling pedophile priests to new congregations in search of fresh meet. Gee, that makes it all better. Where was the Vatican’s outrage when this story first broke a decade or so ago? The Church could have taken the high road and immediately started cooperating […]

Poison Butter, Fat Japanese and Junk Food Pushers »

Evidently it doesn’t take much to be a professor in New Zealand. Or a “top public health expert,” for that matter. Professor Rod Jackson (which would be an excellent screen name for a porn star) has declared that butter is poison. He uses the word repeatedly in his rants. He claims “We have a health […]